Past the Point of no Return
Insanity is a kind of illness - so, think that I am ill. No one, I mean no one from the living beeings is likely to understand everything that is breaking me from the inside. Lucian... It is a kind of my insanity, obsession - the thing that doesn't let me go.
Und wir warten auf die Nacht... Lucian, du bist ein Kind des Licht, du bist die Schmerz. Du siest die Welt nur noch in dunklen Farben, aber ich kann ohne dich sein. Lucian, geboren aus dunkler Vergangenheit...Reich mir die Hand...
I can do nothing with myself, but I do always percieve Lucian as a boy from Germany, as I percieve Inri as Norwegian... They differ from us - they ARE different, strangers if you wish. It is a very hurting feeling to understand it. It is painful to know that they are and will always be in the form of dolls, though I often see Inri smiling, but only in dreams. It is very hard, be sure. Pffffff....
Don't be afraid of what you don't know - I always repeat it to myself. But I am really afraid that I won't be able to escape the reality, I've created. It is enormously difficult to go outdoors, to see people. I go to my students because I understand that they need me.. And because I know, that my beloved boys need something new and it is always pricy. So that's it.
How I wish to break this captivity... Aber ich bin im Banne. So steht die Sache.
Und wir warten auf die Nacht... Lucian, du bist ein Kind des Licht, du bist die Schmerz. Du siest die Welt nur noch in dunklen Farben, aber ich kann ohne dich sein. Lucian, geboren aus dunkler Vergangenheit...Reich mir die Hand...
I can do nothing with myself, but I do always percieve Lucian as a boy from Germany, as I percieve Inri as Norwegian... They differ from us - they ARE different, strangers if you wish. It is a very hurting feeling to understand it. It is painful to know that they are and will always be in the form of dolls, though I often see Inri smiling, but only in dreams. It is very hard, be sure. Pffffff....
Don't be afraid of what you don't know - I always repeat it to myself. But I am really afraid that I won't be able to escape the reality, I've created. It is enormously difficult to go outdoors, to see people. I go to my students because I understand that they need me.. And because I know, that my beloved boys need something new and it is always pricy. So that's it.
How I wish to break this captivity... Aber ich bin im Banne. So steht die Sache.